'WINNING MINDS' THOUGHTS AND MUSINGS FROM THE GYM LOCKER ROOM

I just finished a gym workout out earlier today. Wait don’t panic I am not going to post up what I did or any of that bollocks. I am to old in the tooth for that and I don’t need my ego massaged. (my back, neck, legs maybe!)

No seriously as I was lacing up my trendy Shoezone trainers in the changing rooms getting ready to leave when it dawned on me just how long I had been going into gyms and training on a daily basis week in week without fail and what still motivated me to drag my ageing but still sexy ass in there.

Thinking more about this (not my ass) I realised that 1975 was the first time I entered a gym.

I was in my last year of school and my best mate was a schoolboy weight-lifting champion and trained at the then legendary Empire club gym in Bristol.

He arranged with the owner Dennis Welsh and our school P.E teacher for some of us lads to go there in our double games period and workout. I was one of those lads and at 14 years of age I was introduced into the world of fitness in a serious way.

Of course, it didn’t start out like that as a 14-year-old lad the training was a matter of fucking about a bit, talking a lot, trying to lift heavier shit than you could and doing the odd bit of proper training.

The fucking about bit didn’t last long as Dennis Welsh would have none of it and usually some huge bodybuilder or power lifter would put you straight hopefully without ripping your lungs out in the process or locking you naked in the sauna.

At the same time, I also started my Martial arts training. I didn’t realise how these two things would shape my future. But that is another story.

The next year when I left school, I joined the Empire properly as a 16-year-old boy and now as a 58-year-old Granddad I am still in the gym training.

As a young lad I fell in love with the whole gym culture and would soak up the atmosphere and knowledge from every source I could. I met some wonderful characters.

Many of the places I trained are no longer there, but they hold great memories for me.

All these years later I can count the number of weeks on one hand where I didn’t train.

As a young man when my mates were clubbing, pissing it up and chasing girls you would find me training in one shape or form.

I made many sacrifices not just socially but also in what I ate and drank.

No pizzas, MacDonald’s or KFC for me.  Hang on a minute when I was a teenager those places didn’t even exist in Britain so you couldn’t eat shit even if you wanted!!!

I am not saying I lived like a monk but I knew what had to be done if I wanted to succeed in the goals that I had set myself.(check out my book When we were Warriors if you want the full story of my journey).

These days I train as much as the old body lets me. I am no longer training to smash goals, blaze trails, increase the poundage I lift, do a 1000 burpees, to compete or of course to post myself online with my six pack out.

(I still have the remnants of a six pack but sometimes it gets hidden behind what looks like a child’s pink bum bag hanging around my waist).

My motivation these days to train are mainly for weight management and vanity.

 (I still like to be able to walk around poolside on holiday without hiding myself under a XXL baggy £3.00 pink Primark T shirt with Hawaii Surfing ,Bondi beach, Daytona Drag racing or some other exotic location I have never been to or have a fucking clue about emblazoned on it).

Also, I want to be fit enough to enjoy my grandchildren and to have 3 minutes of all out balls to the wall fight in me when the shit hits the fan. (Not with my Grandchildren.)

I have seen incredible changes in the fitness industry over the 40 plus years that I have lived in gyms not only training but as a fitness coach.

I have always been asked how to do you still keep up your training?

Well as I was tying my trainers this morning, I realised all the great training and nutrition advice that is out there these days, all the weird and wonderful machines and exercises means nothing without being able to train the mind to get into the gym in the first place.

Forget everything else it means fuck all if you haven’t got the mental strength and tenacity to turn and be answerable.

No excuses and bullshit reasoning. That is all bollocks.

Mindset is the one major thing that keeps me getting me into the gym.

Yes, there are many mornings when I get up that I have to have a word with myself in the bathroom mirror.

Some mornings I crawl out of bed like a 90-year-old. I am stiff as a board but in all the wrong places. But that has been a ritual that I have gone through for years. Does it get any easy? Fuck no!

Usually the word is… Wake up you bastard and be glad you have seen another sunrise. Stop feeling sorry for yourself you fucking self-pitying wimp, top looking for excuses and ways out. Now get your ass in gear and get out into the world and make a fucking difference you soft needy bastard.

 That normally works but you have got to be prepared to lay yourself bare to benefit from this. That takes honesty and courage.

My motivations to train mean ABSOLUTELY NOTHING without the mindset to get the fuck in the gym in the first place. READ THAT STATEMENT AGAIN. It is the absolute key.

Your mind is your Master.

If you struggle with this then maybe, consider contacting me about my ‘Winning minds’ programme. I can genuinely help because I practise what I preach every day.

Self Defence or Fighting?

Self Defence or Fighting?

To explore the above question, we have firstly got to distinguish that self- defence techniques are not fighting techniques.

Having a ‘fight’ is a mutually agree thing between usually two parties unless it is gang violence.

Normally fights start over anything from ego, status, pride, standing, belonging and insecurity to religion, politics, sport or woman.

Done of these things have anything to do with self defence.

Most of the time alcohol or drugs will fuel the fight and even sane people become arseholes

.

Remember outside the confines of the contest mat, ring or cage fighting is illegal and against the law.

No matter who instigated it if you make the decision to participate you are as guilty as the other person.

Much of what is shown on social media sites these days are fighting techniques not self- defence. There seems to be much confusion from individuals teaching this stuff.

I hear their demonstrations open with the dialogue such as ‘ In a street fight ‘or ‘If you get into a fight in the street’. These statements are already nothing to do with self- defence.

Remember even a plea of self -defence has to be proved. Being taught Martial arts techniques doesn’t give you a free pass to inflicting whatever damage you like on another human being even if they deserve it.

I believe a vast majority of people training in Martial arts believe it does.

If this is the case, you will find yourself in a shitload of trouble if you decide to use your skills on the street without some basis knowledge of the law of the land.

In any confrontational situation it is best to pack away your ‘Chimp’ brain and your ‘Macho ego’ and use your rational brain to consider the consequences of your actions.

To use a quote from the film Roadhouse. ‘Nobody ever wins a fight.’

There will always be aftermath and consequences.

If you do defend yourself you have better believe 100% that you were justified in your actions, otherwise you will have plenty of time to refine your combative skills in one of Her Majesty’s hotels.

My opinion is as a skilled Martial artist you should not be engaging in social violence. You should follow a code of ethics that says you will only use your skills when your life or your loved ones life is under threat and you have run out of all other opinions.

It is better to avoid a situation or de-escalate one than wade into it like the Terminator.

As a civilian the skills you have learnt are a backup and insurance for when the shit hits the fan.

They are not to be used because somebody cut you up in the traffic or jumped in front of you in a que. That is the ‘chimp’ brain operating. It has hi jacked your rational brain and that means only one thing TROUBLE.

Over some 40 plus years it has been my mission to seek out the world’s best combative techniques and train them.

I know 100’s of different ways to inflict pain on another human being and if need be take them out. The truth though is the better, I got at those moves the more reluctant I am to use them.

My ego has been given a kicking many times over the years in all combative arenas. So, these days it is well in check.

As a middle- aged Granddad, the last thing I want to be doing is tangling with some young buck out to prove a point.

If I have to defend myself, I want to settle it as quickly as possible. I don’t want to be blowing out of my ass in some knock down drag them out encounter.

Quoting Clint Eastwood. A good man knows his limitations.

It is only the man who has not been tested or who is insecure about himself that will actively go out into the public to seek a fight.

If you wish to fight, there are numerous sporting arenas to test yourself in against another person that also wants to test themselves. Mano to Mano with no booze or substances in your blood stream. Stone cold sober takes balls.

My motto is be a Warrior in the arena and a gentlemen outside of it. All the best in my opinion are.

Walking around dragging your knuckles and snarling at everybody with your fight wear on in public isn’t a smart thing to do.

There are people out there who don’t give a fuck about your belts, titles or reputation they will stick a blade your guts or a lump hammer over your head and go home a sleep like a baby.

They aren’t interested in a fair fight. Their only rule is there are no rules.

You can’t wear your reputation like some invisible suit of armour. It isn’t going to protect you.

You would do better to operate under the radar and stay away from places where assholes hang out and better still make sure you aren’t one yourself.

In the street there are only two types of physical violence you will face in a self- defence scenario.

Confrontational violence and Ambush violence.

They may come in many different modes but there are only these two.

Match fighting isn’t in there.

Match fighting is not self- defence.

Yet ironically much of today’s martial arts techniques for ‘self- defence’ are based around match fighting.

For those of you out there looking to take up martial arts you would do well to know exactly what it is you want to learn.

Do not confuse it or get railroaded into something you don’t want to be doing.

I have taught Combative jujutsu and self -protection for more years than I can remember.

I have also ventured into the competition arena in many formats and taught and run a very successful MMA fight team and club for many years.

I still know the difference between the two disciplines and have never crossed them over or taught them as the same thing.

They are not.

The competition arena will be known to you, so will the rules and your opponent, in the street they won’t be.

Also, every self- defence situation is scenario based. The variables are endless.

If you have to defend yourself the time, place, and attacker will not be of your choosing and you won’t be warmed up, stretched out and ready to rumble. It will happen when you least expect it. Not after you have just left the gym or dojo.

You can kid yourself that you will always be prepared and ready for anything but that is bullshit.

In a competitive fight you have a time- line until you are in there doing it.

In the world of self -defence you are training for a situation that may never happen, could happen in 6 months’ time or 6 minutes time. It is a different ball game.

The street predator doesn’t have to be as fit or as ripped as you or be a better fighter.

Remember this is his arena and he will know when to attack you at your most vulnerable.

As already mentioned, he is not interested in fair play, sportsmanship or a friendly fist bump. He is only interested in hitting you hard and fast before you even realise it.

You would do well to understand the difference between self defence techniques and fighting techniques.

Outside the controlled arena do as President Roosevelt once said.

‘Walk quietly and carry a big stick.’